People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize
