sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
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