1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
