Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Randomize
