i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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