i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Randomize