He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
