; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Randomize
