You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Randomize
