I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize