So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize
