Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize