Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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