also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Randomize
