Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
