Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
