I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
