I accidentally burped into my bong.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
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