Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
