this just has baby written all over it
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
