is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
