her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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