is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize
