I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
there was a trapeze. enough said
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
When did angry sex become our thing?
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
