I can tuck mytits in my pants
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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