never play flip cup with pint glasses
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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