fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Randomize
