Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
they call him Oral-B. enough said
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
