Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(269): View more from Michigan

We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.

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(760): View more from California

Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.

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(519): View more from Ontario

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.

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(505): View more from New Mexico

Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water

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(423): View more from Tennessee

I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.

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(318): View more from Louisiana

Can I borrow your pants?

(1-318): View more from Louisiana

WTH?

(318): View more from Louisiana

Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless

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