If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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