So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
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