He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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