they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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