Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
