hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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