I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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