Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Randomize
