So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Randomize