just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
