Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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