He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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