discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
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