I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
