I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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