i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I understand Curling. That high.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize