I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
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