I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Randomize
