i'm signing you up for texting rehab
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize