ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Even the bartender felt bad for me
How's work?
Spinning.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
