I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize